Oh, for the love of fluff …

>Have you ever had a diaper panic? Not a noble, rational type of motherly panic, like, “Oh no, I didn’t pack enough diapers in the bag for our visit to Aunt Mabel’s!”–I’m talking about the totally selfish, fluff-loving, addict’s kind of panic! I had just such a moment last week, and I’m embarrassed to say just what type of desperate measures it had me going to.

I have to begin by saying that I hate toilet dunking. The thought of having to dunk, swish, and rinse cloth diapers in the toilet was nearly enough to scare me off of CDing–until I found out about sprayers and liners, that is! Can you really blame me, though? When I was pregnant with Baby A, I spent a full four months hovering over that porcelain throne at least twice daily (at home, at work, at the mall, wherever), spilling my guts at all times of the day and night. When you get so accustomed that that type of horrific view, perhaps you think you would become desensitized to being so close to that dingy bowl, but no–if anything, it only made me loathe the toilet even more. Now, anything making me hover above a toilet and assume that type of position (facing it for any reason!) makes me feel a queasy revulsion just by association. So, for that reason, I was certain I’d never, ever, under any circumstances reach in and do the swish.

I’m sure you see where this is going … 😉

Now, up til now, I’ve had a good thing going in terms of diaper cleanup. I’ve been using a dry pail from day one (with EBF diapers) and was loving the simplicity of that ‘toss and forget about it’ method. Now that we’re onto solids, I knew things would be getting slighly more complicated, but up til now I’ve been able to use liners to make things easy to dispose of.

The other day, however, I had just received and prepped a new diaper for review. I would be posting photos of this diaper (on my other website) alongside its review, and I was loving how cute and soft it looked. So, just to tempt fate, I thought I would put it on my daughter for just a moment to see how it fit her. I wasn’t intending to keep it on her for more than just a minute or two as I still hadn’t photographed it looking clean and new for the review (I take pictures of the liner, waist, gussets, etc). I really should have known better!

Well, wouldn’t you know it–she had it on for a mere minute or less when she decided to unleash within it something too horrid to speak of. I hadn’t laid a liner in it, of course, because I hadn’t intended her to wear it for any real duration of time. I sat by, wide-eyed and helpless, holding my breath and willing the mess to be minor.

When the coast seemed clear, I peeled back the velcro and saw that of course, as Murphy’s Law would have it, there was something funky in there the likes of which I’d never seen before! And suddenly, my rational mind flew out the window! I forgot my diva-ish ways, my traumatic puking memories, and all the rest of it. I had that diaper off her little bum so fast, and I flew down the hallway to the nearest bathroom. Before I knew what I was doing, I chucked the entire dipe into the toilet bowl in a desperate act to save it from staining. After all, no careful amount of scraping or flicking could have dealt with that fiasco.

A moment later, I regained my sanity as I stood above the toilet gazing down into the very literal mess that I had gotten myself into. There in the murky waters, my brand new diaper sunk to the bottom of the bowl, waterlogged.

So, what would you have done?

I didn’t! Oh, yes I did. It had to be done.

Bare-handed, I plunged my way in after it. I swished and dunked and rubbed and wrung that diaper until I thought it seemed like it was in the clear from staining. I looked down at my girly little hands, amazed I had just done such a rank thing, and all for the sake of … saving a cute diaper! Oh, the vanity! Ha!

After a few flushes, rinses, and wrings, I carried the soggy little package back to the diaper pail and dropped it in, feeling satisfied that I had done my darndest. A day and a half later, as the little AIO came out of the laundry, gleaming, I smirked, guarding my own tiny secret as I photographed the cute little diaper for public review. I vowed to myself that I would never, ever, as long as I lived, expose what I had done in such a time of frenzied, fluff-crazed desperation…

…except perhaps here, on my blog 😉

so, how far have you gone for your fluffy love affair? 😉

6 thoughts on “Oh, for the love of fluff …

  1. Cristina

    >I bought a diaper diaper this morning ar 2:30 because I had been waiting for a wahm stocking and when I saw that she posted it last might I knew I had to act quickly!

  2. Stephah

    >I'm with you girl – I also NEVER intend on swishing in the toilet! In fact, at first it made me gag a little to lift up the toilet seat and PLOP! shake some poop off the liner into the bowl.

    I haven't yet, but I hereby vow to learn from your misfortune (I'm sorry!! haha) and NEVER put my daughter in any diaper – even for a minute! 😉 – without a liner!

    Thanks for sharing 🙂

  3. Heather

    >Not a new diaper but mhy lil guy had just learned the sign for diaper. one morning i changed his diaper and literaly one minute later he is signing diaper im like you got to be kidding me. but i get closer i know he isnt. i should have been expecting it though in hind sight though 4day constipation and i had been feeding him rasins and figs to help. so i'm gagging as i clean it up. I dont have a sprayer but my shower head reaches the toilet i rarely need it cause it usally just shakes off. i get done and go back to see him an he is signing diaper again. sure enough he wasnt done and this one is worse. I was thanking the god of gussets with that one. lets just say a fleece blanket met its end the next morning.


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